I don’t believe in New Year’s Resolutions. I especially don’t believe in New Year’s goals meant to make us feel shitty about ourselves. I won’t be fasting in the new year, hitting the gym twice as hard, drinking only green drinks, or doing any number of well-marketed plans that use empowering, appropriated, language to get at the same destructive message: You’re not good enough as you are and you need to starve/punish/contort yourself into something alien and acceptable. Instead, I’m offering a few reminders to myself and anyone else who might need them.
- Stop arguing with misogynists (racists/homophobes/etc.) on the internet. Now this is not an excuse to walk away when someone who shares my sites of privilege is being an asshole. I will still wade into your white nonsense, as ever. But I’m going to stop fighting the fights that hit my soft places. Maybe you can too.
- Meal prep is worth its weight in gold. I’m going to keep doing meal prep because it sets me up for a better week, lets me save money rather than going out for food, and lets me choose mostly foods that nourish me rather than diving into a bag of chips because I’m too tired to cook.
- Making time in your schedule for purposeful movement is important. Working out over the lunch hour makes me feel good, lets me come back to my desk refreshed, and, best of all, doesn’t require getting up early or staying late.
- Trying new things is rewarding and scary and stretches your bravery muscle. Keep doing it. Next up: Aerial yoga.
- Waking up to a clean kitchen sets you up well for the day. Take five minutes to wash every dish in the sink before bed.
- The fight for justice is just that: a fight. It doesn’t require niceness or acquiescence. It requires integrity, fortitude, and sustainability. Take care of yourself, but don’t stop fighting.
- Keep writing (or start writing). We need more voices in the world critiquing the status quo, offering alternatives or just confirmation that things really are that fucked up. See if you can make some money for all the labour you put into your writing.
- Trust your gut. It rarely-to-never steers you wrong as long as you don’t let the noise in your head crowd it out.
- Try not to worry so much about how your body looks. Ultimately, you can feed it well, move it as much as possible, and it’s going to do what it does.
- Get a (or more) tattoo(s). Let your body be your canvas. Make it as beautiful or ugly as you want. Claim it for yourself.
- Stop giving emotional labour away for free. If femmes stopped providing emotional labour for free the world would grind to a halt. Let’s hasten that.
- You are good enough just as you are. You are enough just as you are. Take more time to celebrate all the things you do well, all the times you fall and get back up again, all the times you look fear in the face and shakingly do it anyway.
Happy new year. Be good to yourself.